As our economic turmoil looks set to turn even bleaker, do not worsen your situation by paying to see these potential turkeys.Sex Drive
The latest teen sex movie kicks off the new year. Probably the only comedy trailer I have ever seen where the entire audience has not made so much as a titter. If these are the best jokes and set pieces the trailer could offer then avoid like gonohreah!
The latest teen sex movie kicks off the new year. Probably the only comedy trailer I have ever seen where the entire audience has not made so much as a titter. If these are the best jokes and set pieces the trailer could offer then avoid like gonohreah!
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs
How many times can people find a squirrel chasing an acorn THAT funny?
X-men Origins: Wolverine
Without Bryan Singer behind this prequel, I can sense yet another abysmal depiction like Ratner's X-Men 3. Is there really any need for learning about Logan's past after the stunning X-2?
The Brazilian Job
The most overrated actor, former rapper, Mark Whalberg no doubt steals some gold again. Bearing in mind The Italian Job remake was never actually set in Italy hopefully this film will have the decency to do what the title says. As this franchise gets progressively worse like that of Ocean's 11 hopefully the minimal box office takings will put an end to a potential trilogy.
Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
Oh well, at least Kate Beckinsale will be scantily clad in tight Lycra again, nice.
Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian
A series of seasonal films that only take in a decent profit due to their release dates. If I were to put money on a film that would be the greatest flop of 2009 it would be this one. Scheduled for a May release, people will fail to embrace it outside the season of goodwill. Expect yet another unfunny film full of talented comedians all worthy of far better material. It seems the Frat pack have lost their grip on the pulse of modern edgy comedy.
How many times can people find a squirrel chasing an acorn THAT funny?
X-men Origins: Wolverine
Without Bryan Singer behind this prequel, I can sense yet another abysmal depiction like Ratner's X-Men 3. Is there really any need for learning about Logan's past after the stunning X-2?
The Brazilian Job
The most overrated actor, former rapper, Mark Whalberg no doubt steals some gold again. Bearing in mind The Italian Job remake was never actually set in Italy hopefully this film will have the decency to do what the title says. As this franchise gets progressively worse like that of Ocean's 11 hopefully the minimal box office takings will put an end to a potential trilogy.
Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
Oh well, at least Kate Beckinsale will be scantily clad in tight Lycra again, nice.
Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian
A series of seasonal films that only take in a decent profit due to their release dates. If I were to put money on a film that would be the greatest flop of 2009 it would be this one. Scheduled for a May release, people will fail to embrace it outside the season of goodwill. Expect yet another unfunny film full of talented comedians all worthy of far better material. It seems the Frat pack have lost their grip on the pulse of modern edgy comedy.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
As visually striking as the prolonged original was, there is just no real call for a sequel.
The Fast and the Furious 4
The Fast and the Furious 4
Vin Diesel finally gets some work again by succumbing to a franchise he vowed never to return to. This bodes really well.
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Is there any heroic figure left in American society yet to be dramatised? Brendan Frasier continues to revive his dismal comeback with yet another dire film that no one has ever expressed any demand for.
Final Destination 4: Death Trip 3D
Final Destination 4: Death Trip 3D
The only reason this film has been made is due to its 3D gimmick. Get ready for another film full of annoying teenagers predictably being killed in a string of OTT set pieces.
SAW VI
SAW VI
Expect a sequel to be released every Halloween until people stop paying to see them, which doesn't seem like any time soon.
Sherlock Holmes
Sherlock Holmes
Guy Ritchie gives us a contemporary Kung Fu fighting Sherlock Holmes played by Robert Downey Junior. He could in fact surprise us with an entertaining film, but I very much doubt it.
Alvin and the Chipmunks 2: The Squeakuel
Alvin and the Chipmunks 2: The Squeakuel
The original proved that the film's plot cannot be carried by a bunch of annoying chipmunks squeaking their way through proceedings. Only having this one joke to work with, it seems to have now worked its way into the actual title.
Angels and Demons
Angels and Demons
A long haired Robert Langdon returns! Without Ian McKellen this sequel is bound to be even more lifeless and droll.
The Chronicles of Narnia: Parts 3-5
Luckily Disney announced they have no intention of releasing any further Narnia books. Hopefully the same will happen for Pullman's equally massacred His Dark Materials.
The Chronicles of Narnia: Parts 3-5
Luckily Disney announced they have no intention of releasing any further Narnia books. Hopefully the same will happen for Pullman's equally massacred His Dark Materials.
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